Stars

How different military branches use the stars:

The U.S. Army sleeps beneath the stars.
The U.S. Navy uses the stars to navigate.
The U.S. Air Force chooses their hotels based on the stars.

Training done right:

A drill sergeant grumbles at his fresh young trainee, "I didn't see you at camouflage training this morning, Private." "Thank you very much, Sir," replies the soldier.

5 Militairy facts

1. What is a Soldier's least favorite month? MARCH! 
2. What does ARMY mean to you? "A Recruiter Misled You"
3. What do you call a military officer who goes to the bathroom a lot? A LOOtenant! 
4.  What do you call someone who joined the military out of spite? A PETTY officer!
   
5. Why aren't there any insects in an Army base? It's a NO FLY zone!

An old grandma 

An old grandma brings a bus driver a bag of peanuts every day. First the bus driver enjoyed the peanuts but after a week of eating them he asked: "Please granny, don't bring me peanuts anymore. Have them yourself.". The granny answers: "You know, I don't have teeth anymore. I just prefer to suck the chocolate around them."